I'm a night time person, always have been, always will be. This complicates my life with an almost-toddler. Elijah usually wakes up between 7 and 8. When I didn't get to bed until 2 the night before, I have trouble getting out of bed and getting into the nursery to get him. It helps that he's waiting for me holding his paci out because he knows pacies are just for bed and naps now. It always makes me laugh.
But he's going through a rough time, getting in some of his back teeth. All he wants is to be held--all day. I love him, and I love to carry him around and snuggle. But he's almost 14 months old. He's heavy, he needs to play and figure out the standing and walking thing. So, occasionally, I put him down. And he screams. So, I pick him back up and he starts pointing at things he wants to play with, but only if I'm holding him. It makes for a long day.
His new favorite toy is the cats. They are less fond of him. Once again, this complicates life.
He loves to "pet" the cats. Usually this means he grabs handfuls of
their fur and skin and pulls. Or, he pulls on their ears. We're trying
to teach him about gentle. But he's young and still doesn't
quite get it. I usually don't let him pet Hecate because she's much
more likely to bite him. Hyperion just glares at him and deals with it.
Since he's teething, his napping schedule is all off. He takes a morning nap and an afternoon nap. Morning nap usually between 8:30 and 10. Afternoon nap between noon and two. That's not how long he sleeps, that's just he time he goes down depending how long he slept in. But even if he's been rubbing his eyes and yawning for an hour before hand, he still jumps in his crib and screams after I put him down. Then, I end up hating myself until he actually falls asleep.
Elijah is trying to work on words these days. He knows what sound a cow makes, but he seems to think that's the sound every animal makes. When I ask what the cow says he pulls his mouth tight and blows air across his little teeth it sounds like a tractor sound. It's too cute. He also tries to mimic what the cats say he makes a high pitched little "ah."
He is the cutest, funniest little guy ever.
Showing posts with label being a mom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label being a mom. Show all posts
Friday, March 15, 2013
Friday, February 1, 2013
7 Quick Takes
one
Does anyone else dread the development questions at the pediatrician? Seriously, I always go in there a nervous wreck that he is going to tell me Elijah is way behind or having a problem or something. Yes he's a year old and not walking or talking (beyond 'Mama' and 'Dada') or pointing. We're working on clapping. But he is an adorable, funny, rambunctious baby who loves to give kisses and wave hi. Why are these not on the question list?
two
three
We bought my laptop in 2008 because we had tried sharing a computer for the first year or two of marriage. This experience taught us we need separate computers to function as a happily married couple. Slowly, over the last year and a half, the laptop has been falling to pieces. For Christmas this year, I asked for a new lower-end desk top. I told Nathan exactly what I wanted and picked it out.
The thing about Nathan is, if he is going to buy something like a computer, he's not going buy lower-end. He has friends who mess around with computers and components as a hobby and a brother-in-law who works in IT. So for Christmas I got: a wireless keyboard and mouse, a new monitor, and the promise that at some point in the future his former desktop tower would be cleaned up with a new hard drive and ready for my use. That day has come, my friends! I can't wait to finally have a computer I can use without fear of it falling apart on me.
four
A little while ago, my dad started a blog. He has been hearing from several sources for a long time that he needs to write. I will always remember when his parents used to go to Texas for the winter; my parents would sit us all down every month or so with a piece of paper and have us write them, what I'm sure were painfully difficult to read letters about the ups and downs of life in an elementary school family of six. My dad would write two to four page letters. It's a gift he has.
His most recent post is about my nephew Brian and it's adorable. Pop over to prairiecurmudgeon.blogspot.com
five
Please know that I am neither complaining nor bragging, I'm just curious. Elijah still takes three naps a day. Is that normal?
six
Today is my last day of vacation. *tear* Apart from Elijah teething and getting shots and running a fever these last few days, it's been pretty great. I even got to extend it two days. I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to next vacation at the end of June. I finally managed to arrange vacation around one of my absolute favorite days of the year, Ribfest. My sisters will be in town, we will go to the best party, and eat all kinds of foods. I am so excited!
seven
Who else is scarred by last week's Downton Abbey? I mean really! If they had to kill someone why couldn't it have been Thomas or O'Brien? And why can poor Daisy not catch a romantic break to save her life?
For more Seven Quick Takes, head on over to Conversion Diary!
Monday, January 28, 2013
Oldest child perils
It must be very difficult to be an oldest child. I am the second of four, so I don't really have much frame of reference for it. But, based on how many times a week I pose a question about our son's life or upbringing to my husband and we both say, "I don't know," I'm sure it's no barrel of laughs.
I picture an adult Elijah one day speaking with friends, or a spouse, or a psychiatrist saying "My parents are great (at least I hope he says that) but when I came along they really had no clue what they were doing." NO FREAKING CLUE
The biggest quandry right now is feeding him. We have moved away from exclusively feeding baby food and are introducing different solid foods. My problem is, now that it's not just a matter of getting to the bottom of a puree cup and being finished, I really don't know how much to feed him. Today at lunch, for instance he had a couple spoonfuls of corn, a crumbled piece of cheese, some Gerber crunchies and his milk, which he took out of a sippy cup for the first time today.
Elijah is a child who will eat until he pukes, so I really don't know when he's full and just eating because it's there. Thank God we have his year check up with the pediatrician on Wednesday!
I picture an adult Elijah one day speaking with friends, or a spouse, or a psychiatrist saying "My parents are great (at least I hope he says that) but when I came along they really had no clue what they were doing." NO FREAKING CLUE
The biggest quandry right now is feeding him. We have moved away from exclusively feeding baby food and are introducing different solid foods. My problem is, now that it's not just a matter of getting to the bottom of a puree cup and being finished, I really don't know how much to feed him. Today at lunch, for instance he had a couple spoonfuls of corn, a crumbled piece of cheese, some Gerber crunchies and his milk, which he took out of a sippy cup for the first time today.
Elijah is a child who will eat until he pukes, so I really don't know when he's full and just eating because it's there. Thank God we have his year check up with the pediatrician on Wednesday!
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Mama needs a drink
Disclaimer: Very much not bragging with these first couple sentences.
Today has been rough. Elijah doesn't usually have bad days. (Again, not bragging.) But usually he is very happy and calm. Which is why days like today are even more difficult.
He was cranky and fussy all morning. I think he's getting another tooth because all he wants is for Mama to carry him around. Which, I am perfectly happy to do, but the kid weighs 19 pounds and after a while my arms get tired. So, I've taken to pulling up VeggieTales on Netflix and laying down on the couch with him when he gets really cranky.
He has graduated to the next level in swim class, which means we have it on Wednesday mornings now, so we got all ready and left (late) for swim class. He had a complete MELTDOWN in the car. Seriously from my in-laws' house all the way to the class he screamed and cried. It was awful, made worse because we were behind a very slow moving vehicle. When we finally got to the gym and I went to get him out of the car seat, I saw a brand new very big, red scratch down the middle of his nose. Poor little guy!
He tried to drown me a couple times in swim class. No joke. We blow bubbles while the babies watch us so they can see how to blow bubbles. Elijah likes grabbing hair, and he noticed when my face was down by the water blowing bubbles, he could grab my hair. So, he held my face in the water a couple times.
He was very vocal today in swim class and did not want to sit still. And now he's been asleep for about 45 minutes.
I hate how much we've been watching Netflix lately, even if I do find VeggieTales less objectionable than most little kid programs.
The problem is every new stage he goes through is also a new stage for us. I don't know how to play with a little guy his age and that makes the day difficult for both of us. He no longer seems as enamored of peek-a-boo as he used to and while I've found a winner with hiding his plastic cow and asking him to find it, I don't know what other games to play with him. He is still very happy and giggly, but it's hard to entertain him as one person.
He is trying very hard to pull himself up on things and not having a lot of success and getting cranky about that. I blame the hardwood floors. When he pulls up, his feet just slide under whatever it is he's pulling on. Any advice?
My favorite thing now is that he will actually sit on my lap and let me read him a book without trying too hard to pull it out of my hands to chew on it. And when he's really tired and we sit in the rocker for reading before nap or bed, he leans against me and listens to me read. Yeah, I love that!
Today has been rough. Elijah doesn't usually have bad days. (Again, not bragging.) But usually he is very happy and calm. Which is why days like today are even more difficult.
He was cranky and fussy all morning. I think he's getting another tooth because all he wants is for Mama to carry him around. Which, I am perfectly happy to do, but the kid weighs 19 pounds and after a while my arms get tired. So, I've taken to pulling up VeggieTales on Netflix and laying down on the couch with him when he gets really cranky.
He has graduated to the next level in swim class, which means we have it on Wednesday mornings now, so we got all ready and left (late) for swim class. He had a complete MELTDOWN in the car. Seriously from my in-laws' house all the way to the class he screamed and cried. It was awful, made worse because we were behind a very slow moving vehicle. When we finally got to the gym and I went to get him out of the car seat, I saw a brand new very big, red scratch down the middle of his nose. Poor little guy!
He tried to drown me a couple times in swim class. No joke. We blow bubbles while the babies watch us so they can see how to blow bubbles. Elijah likes grabbing hair, and he noticed when my face was down by the water blowing bubbles, he could grab my hair. So, he held my face in the water a couple times.
He was very vocal today in swim class and did not want to sit still. And now he's been asleep for about 45 minutes.
I hate how much we've been watching Netflix lately, even if I do find VeggieTales less objectionable than most little kid programs.
The problem is every new stage he goes through is also a new stage for us. I don't know how to play with a little guy his age and that makes the day difficult for both of us. He no longer seems as enamored of peek-a-boo as he used to and while I've found a winner with hiding his plastic cow and asking him to find it, I don't know what other games to play with him. He is still very happy and giggly, but it's hard to entertain him as one person.
He is trying very hard to pull himself up on things and not having a lot of success and getting cranky about that. I blame the hardwood floors. When he pulls up, his feet just slide under whatever it is he's pulling on. Any advice?
My favorite thing now is that he will actually sit on my lap and let me read him a book without trying too hard to pull it out of my hands to chew on it. And when he's really tired and we sit in the rocker for reading before nap or bed, he leans against me and listens to me read. Yeah, I love that!
Friday, October 26, 2012
7 Quick Takes
-one-
I am ridiculously excited for the upcoming holiday season. I always think of "The Holidays" as starting with Halloween. I have all three of them off work, and I just cannot wait. We tried Elijah's Halloween costume on him today to make sure it fits still. It's a hand-me-down from Sophie, but it's just what I've always wanted for my first child's first Halloween. Stay tuned and I'll post a picture after Wednesday.
-two-
In keeping with the ridiculous excitement, I already have Elijah's first Christmas present.
I think he'll probably get mostly clothes because he is already wearing 12 month outfits and we don't have a lot of 18 monthers. But the Toyland at the Farm and Fleet near our house opened recently! Nathan tried to ban me from going in there. Silly husband!
-three-
Up until now, Elijah has taken a morning nap, just about everyday. Usually between nine and ten, he passes out and sleeps for a half hour to an hour. But it is his late morning nap at 11:30 that I really count on to get things done or take a nap myself before going to work. I've noticed that if he takes a long morning nap, his other one is much shorter. So, I have been trying to abolish the morning nap. It hasn't been easy, and it's still not everyday, but we're definitely working on it.
I've been told to just let him nap when he wants to, but he wakes up happier from his later nap if he sleeps longer. Any thoughts?
-four-
Today is Elijah's nine month birthday! I still find myself seeking out other moms, mostly those with kids around his age, or my own mother, for advice. I feel like I should have a better grasp of things at this point, and for the most part I do. But when he's not feeling well, or if we're getting close to some milestone or talking about changing his routine a little, I start feeling very insecure.
-five-
-six-
I realize this is only going to matter to a few people, but, very exciting news around our house recently. We have found the blue ring! The rock-a-stack has been minus it's blue ring for the last couple months or so because we had no idea where it was. We have an old-style one, so the blue ring is actually the smallest. I was walking through the living room the other day and looked up at the shade of our floor lamp and noticed something blue in it. Sure enough, there it was. There has been much speculation about how it got there.
-seven-
Yesterday we had shift-bid at work for next year. In case anyone is interested I will be working 2nd shift 3-11 pm for the first eight months of the year with Tuesday-Wednesday weekends. I will then move to 3rd shift 11 pm to 7 am for the last four months with the same weekends. I also took my two weeks vacation one week being for Elijah's first birthday and the other, the last full week in June, so hopefully I can be at Ribfest this year.
It didn't turn out quite how I wanted, but I'm sure it'll be just fine!
For more 7 Quick Takes, check out Jen's blog!
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
2/3rds
Elijah is 2/3rds of the way through his first year. His eyes are lighter than they were when he was born and decidedly blue, not grey. His hair went through a brief red period around 1-2 months, but is back to blonde with red highlights.
He is very happy, and very fun. He is working his way through a stage where he doesn't like getting dressed or undressed. With two front teeth on bottom and three on top, Elijah is a very calm teether. The only thing he wants when a tooth is breaking through is to be carried around. He sleeps through every night, even when teeth are coming through.
He loves his food, whether it's a bottle, Gerber crunchies, or fruit/veggie puree. He holds his own bottle regularly now. He loves music, rocking back and forth in his boppy when we've got music on. Books are another of his favorite things. He reaches for them and loves to flip the pages on his own.
Elijah has a couple new tricks: he picks his head up all the time now, and Army crawls. He can push himself onto his hands and knees and rocks there for a little. We'll have a crawler before Halloween! He has just learned how to sit up on his own and we're working on waving. He has also turned into something of a ham baby. Every time he sees the camera he smiles. It's pretty hilarious.
He loves games with movement, when we hold him and dance or run around.
Nathan and I have discovered that while we both love to play and spend time with him individually, we have more fun with him when we are all together. Things are changing all over. The car I've been driving, which used to belong to my grandparents, has become undrivable. We are going to look at other cars tonight and I've been thinking what I want in a vehicle. My biggest priority is having enough room in the back for Elijah's car seat. And then, of course, safety and gas mileage.
We can't wait for Halloween!
He is very happy, and very fun. He is working his way through a stage where he doesn't like getting dressed or undressed. With two front teeth on bottom and three on top, Elijah is a very calm teether. The only thing he wants when a tooth is breaking through is to be carried around. He sleeps through every night, even when teeth are coming through.
He loves his food, whether it's a bottle, Gerber crunchies, or fruit/veggie puree. He holds his own bottle regularly now. He loves music, rocking back and forth in his boppy when we've got music on. Books are another of his favorite things. He reaches for them and loves to flip the pages on his own.
Elijah has a couple new tricks: he picks his head up all the time now, and Army crawls. He can push himself onto his hands and knees and rocks there for a little. We'll have a crawler before Halloween! He has just learned how to sit up on his own and we're working on waving. He has also turned into something of a ham baby. Every time he sees the camera he smiles. It's pretty hilarious.
He loves games with movement, when we hold him and dance or run around.
Nathan and I have discovered that while we both love to play and spend time with him individually, we have more fun with him when we are all together. Things are changing all over. The car I've been driving, which used to belong to my grandparents, has become undrivable. We are going to look at other cars tonight and I've been thinking what I want in a vehicle. My biggest priority is having enough room in the back for Elijah's car seat. And then, of course, safety and gas mileage.
We can't wait for Halloween!
Monday, July 30, 2012
Separation Anxiety
No, not Elijah's...mine. So far, he still seems pretty okay with Mama and Daddy leaving him with one set of grandparents...but it tears me up inside. Even our regular 2 days a week for the three hours we are both at work at the same time. I hate leaving him with anyone. And I actually feel really badly about that because I know my parents and my in-laws take great care of him and have a lot of fun, too.
It's gotten to the point that I kind of want to take him everywhere with me. I had a doctor's appointment in downtown Chicago last Tuesday and wanted to bring him along. But my mom, who was driving, said it would be hard on him. So I left him with my in-laws and then was anxious the whole time. But somehow, leaving while Nathan is home is different, I don't get as nervous about that.
I'm naturally a little solitary and every couple months I do have to have some time to myself. Luckily, last week, Nathan and a friend of his who was visiting, stayed in on a night I had off. So, I got Elijah put to bed and then went up to DeKalb to see Disney's Brave. I didn't know if I'd like being at the movies by myself, but I had a great time. I bought my own box of mini chewy Sweettarts and sat at the back of the theater. The movie was cute, but I had the best time being there alone.
I don't know if all this anxiety is normal. And I can't tell if it's a good thing or not.
It's gotten to the point that I kind of want to take him everywhere with me. I had a doctor's appointment in downtown Chicago last Tuesday and wanted to bring him along. But my mom, who was driving, said it would be hard on him. So I left him with my in-laws and then was anxious the whole time. But somehow, leaving while Nathan is home is different, I don't get as nervous about that.
I'm naturally a little solitary and every couple months I do have to have some time to myself. Luckily, last week, Nathan and a friend of his who was visiting, stayed in on a night I had off. So, I got Elijah put to bed and then went up to DeKalb to see Disney's Brave. I didn't know if I'd like being at the movies by myself, but I had a great time. I bought my own box of mini chewy Sweettarts and sat at the back of the theater. The movie was cute, but I had the best time being there alone.
I don't know if all this anxiety is normal. And I can't tell if it's a good thing or not.
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Did I really say that?
There are a bunch of things I never thought I'd say that have become part of my life since we brought Elijah home.
"I don't care what side of the bed I sleep on." Nathan and I (or maybe just me) used to be big into "that's your side, this is my side." When we got home with the baby, Nathan's wonderful sister, Janelle, and her husband had set up the pack and play their daughter used as a bassinet in our room, because we didn't have a bassinet. They set it up on Nathan's side of the bed. If you remember, we got home in the middle of the night. I collapsed onto the side closest to the bassinet and haven't thought about it since.
"For the love of St. Michael, where is the musical panda?!" The loss, even temporarily, of my son's favorite toy is enough for household panic and an attic to basement search. Before this the only thing that got my attention like that was losing my keys or ipod.
"Hold still, Mama has to get the bugger." Yes, I pick his nose. I really never thought about having to do that while I contemplated parenthood.
"Here it comes, yummy, yummy peas." You could supplement "squash" for peas, but I hate peas a lot more than squash.
"Gots" In any context as in, "Mama gots it," or "Daddy gots it." I watch my grammar pretty scrupulously and initially I was appalled when I heard myself say this. Then I got over it.
"Okay, let's just watch 'Robin Hood.'" I'm working on getting over my screen phobia, but I surprised myself the first time I put a movie in. It was about 100 degrees and he was tired and cranky and I was out of ideas.
"I don't care what side of the bed I sleep on." Nathan and I (or maybe just me) used to be big into "that's your side, this is my side." When we got home with the baby, Nathan's wonderful sister, Janelle, and her husband had set up the pack and play their daughter used as a bassinet in our room, because we didn't have a bassinet. They set it up on Nathan's side of the bed. If you remember, we got home in the middle of the night. I collapsed onto the side closest to the bassinet and haven't thought about it since.
"For the love of St. Michael, where is the musical panda?!" The loss, even temporarily, of my son's favorite toy is enough for household panic and an attic to basement search. Before this the only thing that got my attention like that was losing my keys or ipod.
"Hold still, Mama has to get the bugger." Yes, I pick his nose. I really never thought about having to do that while I contemplated parenthood.
"Here it comes, yummy, yummy peas." You could supplement "squash" for peas, but I hate peas a lot more than squash.
"Gots" In any context as in, "Mama gots it," or "Daddy gots it." I watch my grammar pretty scrupulously and initially I was appalled when I heard myself say this. Then I got over it.
"Okay, let's just watch 'Robin Hood.'" I'm working on getting over my screen phobia, but I surprised myself the first time I put a movie in. It was about 100 degrees and he was tired and cranky and I was out of ideas.
Friday, July 6, 2012
7 Quick Takes
one
A big thanks to my cousin Larry. He read about my troubles getting Elijah to nap and he passed on some advise his daughter's pediatrician gave him and his wife. Establish nap times, always put the baby down at the same times every day and eventually they will get the hint. I have to say, this has already helped out a lot. I started putting Elijah down for naps at 11:30 and he really hasn't fought it too much. He cried the first couple days, but always dropped off to sleep eventually. We haven't yet established an earlier nap time and I'm gone in the afternoons, but the 11:30 has really helped out. Thanks, Larry!
two
Anne's home!! She came home this past weekend and has been hanging out for a couple days. It is so nice to have her around.
three
Ever since we brought the baby home, Nathan and I have gotten away from doing the monthly budgeting that we were before. We have had to recover from adoption expenses, but I noticed lately that we were spending a lot more than we should be. It was especially handy to have cash that was our only personal spending money for the month. So today, I think I'm going to drag the notebook back out and try to get us back on track
four
We are going to be having a house guest in a couple weeks. A friend of Nathan's whom he doesn't get to see very often is coming to stay with us for a few days. We have been trying to get the house cleaned and ready for company. I had no idea how hard this actually is with a little one. We kind of wait until there are two of us here so one can play with the baby and the other can clean. This means we can clean at 11:30 pm when I get home from work, and Friday, Saturday, and Sunday mornings and Monday and Tuesday evenings.
five
six
Baby boy has developed some frightening habits. He has started rolling onto his stomach in his sleep. I know he's perfectly fine, but it terrifies me every time I check on him and find him that way. I have to fight the urge to flip him back over. He also takes his pacifier out and tries to eat it. I kid you not. He has a "hospital" style paci, they're the only kind he'll take, and I read they are specifically designed so that they can't be swallowed, but today I found him with it almost completely in his mouth and kind of freaked out. It might be time to take the pacis away.
seven
I actually wrote this post on Thursday afternoon. I love Nathan being home on Fridays, but it kind of throws off my rhythm and Friday is usually over before I even think about 7 Quick Takes.
For more 7 Quick Takes, check out Conversion Diary.
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Advice
I love taking Elijah to Mass with me. I think it's important for him to know this is something we do every week unless we have a very strong reason not to. I also like watching everyone else smile at him as he smiles at them.
Usually we leave around 8:20 for 9 am Mass and I give him his morning bottle in the pew before Mass starts. My problem is what to do when I want to go to confession. Those days I usually just leave him at home with Nathan, but I hate that.
For other Catholic moms or dads who go to Mass on their own, how do you handle this situation? Is it okay to take him into the confessional with me?
Usually we leave around 8:20 for 9 am Mass and I give him his morning bottle in the pew before Mass starts. My problem is what to do when I want to go to confession. Those days I usually just leave him at home with Nathan, but I hate that.
For other Catholic moms or dads who go to Mass on their own, how do you handle this situation? Is it okay to take him into the confessional with me?
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Elijah update
Elijah is almost five months old now, and baby boy has changed a lot.
At his doctor's appointment at the beginning of this month we found out he weighed 14.5 lbs and was 25 inches long. I think he's probably closer to 15 lbs now.
He can sit fairly straight with minimal support.
He eats baby oatmeal and carrots now. We'll start him on something else later this week.
He has a real belly laugh.
He sleeps reliably through the night.
He eats very well.
He has favorite toys: Baby Einstein musical panda and Baby Einstein music box.
His favorite person is probably still Mama.
He will roll from his back to his tummy, but not the other way.
He still hates tummy time.
He loves to play chase. I hold him and we "run" while Nathan chases us, then he tickles Elijah's tummy and turns around and we chase him.
He spends a lot of time outside and loves it. But not this week.
His least favorite thing is probably napping. (Seriously, he does NOT nap well. Which is probably why it's taken me a month to get this blog updated.)
It seems like he has just noticed Hecate and Hyperion. He watches them a lot these days.
He's a lot of fun.
At his doctor's appointment at the beginning of this month we found out he weighed 14.5 lbs and was 25 inches long. I think he's probably closer to 15 lbs now.
He can sit fairly straight with minimal support.
He eats baby oatmeal and carrots now. We'll start him on something else later this week.
He has a real belly laugh.
He sleeps reliably through the night.
He eats very well.
He has favorite toys: Baby Einstein musical panda and Baby Einstein music box.
His favorite person is probably still Mama.
He will roll from his back to his tummy, but not the other way.
He still hates tummy time.
He loves to play chase. I hold him and we "run" while Nathan chases us, then he tickles Elijah's tummy and turns around and we chase him.
He spends a lot of time outside and loves it. But not this week.
His least favorite thing is probably napping. (Seriously, he does NOT nap well. Which is probably why it's taken me a month to get this blog updated.)
It seems like he has just noticed Hecate and Hyperion. He watches them a lot these days.
He's a lot of fun.
Monday, May 21, 2012
Awkward...
This is something that never even crossed my mind when Nathan and I were in the midst of the adoption process. Here's a scenario which has played out several times since we brought Elijah home:
Random Stranger sees Pretty Lady with Adorable Newborn and decides to ask Pretty Lady questions about her pregnancy. I really never even considered this happening. Was I being naive?
Mom and I went shopping in Rockford the other day and had lunch at Olive Garden. Seeing that I had ordered a Diet Coke, the waitress, who was very nice, asked if it was true that drinking caffeine during pregnancy makes for less calm babies.
We then went to the mall where we stopped at Victoria's Secret because I needed new bras. The floor attendant got ready to measure my bust and asked me if it was the first time I had been measured "since baby."
It's not so much a problem that this is catching me off guard, the problem is I don't know how to respond without telling everyone in the world that Elijah is adopted. It's not a bad thing that he is, but I don't want people seeing him as my "adopted son," just my son.
I've also run into a similar problem with people I know, but don't see as often. I don't know why, but ever since we made the decision to adopt, I assumed everyone we knew would know that's what we were doing. Turns out, not so much. Every time I see someone whom I haven't seen in a while and don't interact with on Facebook, they see Elijah, get really excited and say, "I didn't know you had a baby!"
Well...I didn't, but I do.
If there are any other adoptive moms out there who have run into similar situations and have advice how to handle this, I'd appreciate it. Any non-adoptive moms with advice would be welcome, too. :)
Random Stranger sees Pretty Lady with Adorable Newborn and decides to ask Pretty Lady questions about her pregnancy. I really never even considered this happening. Was I being naive?
Mom and I went shopping in Rockford the other day and had lunch at Olive Garden. Seeing that I had ordered a Diet Coke, the waitress, who was very nice, asked if it was true that drinking caffeine during pregnancy makes for less calm babies.
We then went to the mall where we stopped at Victoria's Secret because I needed new bras. The floor attendant got ready to measure my bust and asked me if it was the first time I had been measured "since baby."
It's not so much a problem that this is catching me off guard, the problem is I don't know how to respond without telling everyone in the world that Elijah is adopted. It's not a bad thing that he is, but I don't want people seeing him as my "adopted son," just my son.
I've also run into a similar problem with people I know, but don't see as often. I don't know why, but ever since we made the decision to adopt, I assumed everyone we knew would know that's what we were doing. Turns out, not so much. Every time I see someone whom I haven't seen in a while and don't interact with on Facebook, they see Elijah, get really excited and say, "I didn't know you had a baby!"
Well...I didn't, but I do.
If there are any other adoptive moms out there who have run into similar situations and have advice how to handle this, I'd appreciate it. Any non-adoptive moms with advice would be welcome, too. :)
Monday, May 14, 2012
Screen Time
This is the biggest parenting dilemma I have come across so far.
If you know Nathan and I, you probably know we don't watch television. We have a TV and it is hooked up to the power so we can watch movies, but not to any source of TV programing. The only things I really watch are Dr. Who on Netflix and The Big Bang Theory occasionally on CBS.com or the DVD seasons we have and Pushing Daisies on DVD. Nathan watches even less than I do.
And since we've brought Elijah home, I get really uncomfortable any time he is around any screens. Occasionally, we watch vintage clips of Sesame Street or Mr. Rogers on You Tube. But even children's shows make me uncomfortable. And this really isn't just television, this is any screen. I get antsy when he looks at the computer, too. But, usually when I check my e-mail in the morning, he's sitting on my lap.
I don't even know why it bothers me so much. We watched TV growing up and so did Nathan and his sister. But for some reason, any time Elijah is in the room and there is a screen on, I have to fight the urge to pick him up and go elsewhere.
The only exception was last week, there was a day when it was so hot, Elijah did not want to be held or cuddled and I was getting tired of being screamed at. So I put him in his bouncy chair and pointed it at the TV and we watched Disney's Robin Hood, the one with the foxes. I tried watching a movie we ordered from Netflix while we were playing on the floor, but every time he looked at the screen, I felt a surge of panic and ended up turning it off after about ten minutes.
Instead we listen to a lot of music around here, and we read a lot of books. We go for long walks, and play on the floor.
I realize this complete avoidance of television is probably not good for him, either. I just haven't been able to make myself okay with exposing him to it yet.
**Please understand I am not trying to pass judgement on anyone whose children watch TV. I'm just trying to figure out how things will work for us.**
If you know Nathan and I, you probably know we don't watch television. We have a TV and it is hooked up to the power so we can watch movies, but not to any source of TV programing. The only things I really watch are Dr. Who on Netflix and The Big Bang Theory occasionally on CBS.com or the DVD seasons we have and Pushing Daisies on DVD. Nathan watches even less than I do.
And since we've brought Elijah home, I get really uncomfortable any time he is around any screens. Occasionally, we watch vintage clips of Sesame Street or Mr. Rogers on You Tube. But even children's shows make me uncomfortable. And this really isn't just television, this is any screen. I get antsy when he looks at the computer, too. But, usually when I check my e-mail in the morning, he's sitting on my lap.
I don't even know why it bothers me so much. We watched TV growing up and so did Nathan and his sister. But for some reason, any time Elijah is in the room and there is a screen on, I have to fight the urge to pick him up and go elsewhere.
The only exception was last week, there was a day when it was so hot, Elijah did not want to be held or cuddled and I was getting tired of being screamed at. So I put him in his bouncy chair and pointed it at the TV and we watched Disney's Robin Hood, the one with the foxes. I tried watching a movie we ordered from Netflix while we were playing on the floor, but every time he looked at the screen, I felt a surge of panic and ended up turning it off after about ten minutes.
Instead we listen to a lot of music around here, and we read a lot of books. We go for long walks, and play on the floor.
I realize this complete avoidance of television is probably not good for him, either. I just haven't been able to make myself okay with exposing him to it yet.
**Please understand I am not trying to pass judgement on anyone whose children watch TV. I'm just trying to figure out how things will work for us.**
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
A Few Things
Things that are hard:
Keeping up with this blog while working third shift and taking care of my son. Can you tell? I've been back to work since my last post and in all that time I haven't found a moment when I had the time and energy to update. We've just come through the two most trying weeks of life since we brought Elijah home. And my least favorite part about them has been:
When other people have to step in to help take care of Elijah. We are really lucky to live close to both my parents and Nathan's parents. We are also lucky that they are all crazy about our little guy and don't mind watching him for us. That said, I hate it when I have to ask them to. If being back at work has done anything it has made me more aware of time. I only have so much time at home with him now, and I want it all. So what if I've only slept 2 hours in the last 24? I want my baby, damn it.
Taking care of the house. Not in general, mind. Just while I was on thirds. I would get home from work, feed the baby and take a nap with him. After that, the days are kind of a blur of playing with him and wishing Nathan would get home. Then, when Nathan got him, I dragged myself up to bed to sleep until I had to wake up for work. House chores kind of fell away. I washed bottles only when we didn't have any clean and the laundry definitely piled up untended.
Admitting how happy I am to be on seconds. I love third shift...love it. I love the hours, the work, the people. Everything about third shift is great. Or was. But now, I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am to be working from 3 to 11. I get to sleep like a normal person, and wake up at a normal hour. I get to play with my son and not have a haze of exhaustion keeping me from enjoying myself. I am so happy to be on seconds.
Things that are great:
Elijah's progress. We went out for a birthday dinner tonight and as we sat at the table, me holding Elijah, my plate started sliding towards me. I looked down and his tiny hand was clamped around the edge. He has started rolling over and can sit relatively straight for periods of time, while he's supported. He laughs--my favorite sound ever. He has started vocalizing a lot more and we think he might be starting to get a tooth. And he sleeps through the night for the most part. He's just great.
Nathan. I have Nathan. How lucky am I?
Getting books for my birthday. All Our Worldly Goods by Irene Nemirovsky and Your Personal Penguin by Sandra Boynton. Yes, that last one was for Elijah, but I don't care. I love it.
Doctor Who. Nathan used to tell me I should watch Doctor Who. He said I'd love it, but I ignored him, because it seemed like such a strange show. But he was right. I started watching it when Elijah was about a month old and we were still spending quite a bit of time in the sun room. I love it. More than I've loved any show for quite a while, I love it. And in case you have any Doctor Who background and you're curious: 9 is by far my favorite, but I also love 11.
English folk music: Kate Rusby, June Tabor, Seth Lakeman, Eddi Reader, Smithfield Fair, all great. Can't get enough of them.
Keeping up with this blog while working third shift and taking care of my son. Can you tell? I've been back to work since my last post and in all that time I haven't found a moment when I had the time and energy to update. We've just come through the two most trying weeks of life since we brought Elijah home. And my least favorite part about them has been:
When other people have to step in to help take care of Elijah. We are really lucky to live close to both my parents and Nathan's parents. We are also lucky that they are all crazy about our little guy and don't mind watching him for us. That said, I hate it when I have to ask them to. If being back at work has done anything it has made me more aware of time. I only have so much time at home with him now, and I want it all. So what if I've only slept 2 hours in the last 24? I want my baby, damn it.
Taking care of the house. Not in general, mind. Just while I was on thirds. I would get home from work, feed the baby and take a nap with him. After that, the days are kind of a blur of playing with him and wishing Nathan would get home. Then, when Nathan got him, I dragged myself up to bed to sleep until I had to wake up for work. House chores kind of fell away. I washed bottles only when we didn't have any clean and the laundry definitely piled up untended.
Admitting how happy I am to be on seconds. I love third shift...love it. I love the hours, the work, the people. Everything about third shift is great. Or was. But now, I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am to be working from 3 to 11. I get to sleep like a normal person, and wake up at a normal hour. I get to play with my son and not have a haze of exhaustion keeping me from enjoying myself. I am so happy to be on seconds.
Things that are great:
Elijah's progress. We went out for a birthday dinner tonight and as we sat at the table, me holding Elijah, my plate started sliding towards me. I looked down and his tiny hand was clamped around the edge. He has started rolling over and can sit relatively straight for periods of time, while he's supported. He laughs--my favorite sound ever. He has started vocalizing a lot more and we think he might be starting to get a tooth. And he sleeps through the night for the most part. He's just great.
Nathan. I have Nathan. How lucky am I?
Getting books for my birthday. All Our Worldly Goods by Irene Nemirovsky and Your Personal Penguin by Sandra Boynton. Yes, that last one was for Elijah, but I don't care. I love it.
Doctor Who. Nathan used to tell me I should watch Doctor Who. He said I'd love it, but I ignored him, because it seemed like such a strange show. But he was right. I started watching it when Elijah was about a month old and we were still spending quite a bit of time in the sun room. I love it. More than I've loved any show for quite a while, I love it. And in case you have any Doctor Who background and you're curious: 9 is by far my favorite, but I also love 11.
English folk music: Kate Rusby, June Tabor, Seth Lakeman, Eddi Reader, Smithfield Fair, all great. Can't get enough of them.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
St. Gianna
Technically, I have been a "working mother" ever since we were called to Birthmother's home state the day Elijah was born. But I have been blessed to have 12 weeks to dedicate solely to taking care of, getting to know, and loving my child. I was free of the cares that come with being a real working mother.
But all that ends tonight. My 12 weeks are over and I really begin my new life as a working mom. At 10 o'clock tonight, I will have to kiss my son goodbye and go earn money to help support our family. I've been told the first month or so of being back at work is particularly gut-wrenching.
But there is also a lot to be grateful and joyful for as well. I am blessed to have a family to help support. I am blessed to have a job at which I can earn money to do so.
I think it's truer to my nature. I have loved every day of these last 12 weeks, but I've also been bored, and lonely, and tired of being in the same place all the time. I think deep down, some part of me acknowledges that I couldn't be a stay-at-home mom. I have a great deal of respect for women who are called to that kind of life, but I do not believe I am one of them.
For the next two weeks, I will be gone while my son sleeps. Then I will spend my days praying for him to take nice long naps, so that I can too. After that we change shifts and I switch to working 3 to 11 pm, which I think will be better in the long run. The more I think about it, the more I realize I may have to give up my beloved third shifts and take only seconds and firsts (when they are available), at least until Elijah is in school.
So pray for us this week, please. Pray that Elijah will sleep well for Nathan at nights and then take nice naps for me during the days. Please pray that I don't take being back at work and away from my son too badly.
St. Gianna, patron saint of working mothers, please pray for us.
St. Joseph, pray for us.
But all that ends tonight. My 12 weeks are over and I really begin my new life as a working mom. At 10 o'clock tonight, I will have to kiss my son goodbye and go earn money to help support our family. I've been told the first month or so of being back at work is particularly gut-wrenching.
But there is also a lot to be grateful and joyful for as well. I am blessed to have a family to help support. I am blessed to have a job at which I can earn money to do so.
I think it's truer to my nature. I have loved every day of these last 12 weeks, but I've also been bored, and lonely, and tired of being in the same place all the time. I think deep down, some part of me acknowledges that I couldn't be a stay-at-home mom. I have a great deal of respect for women who are called to that kind of life, but I do not believe I am one of them.
For the next two weeks, I will be gone while my son sleeps. Then I will spend my days praying for him to take nice long naps, so that I can too. After that we change shifts and I switch to working 3 to 11 pm, which I think will be better in the long run. The more I think about it, the more I realize I may have to give up my beloved third shifts and take only seconds and firsts (when they are available), at least until Elijah is in school.
So pray for us this week, please. Pray that Elijah will sleep well for Nathan at nights and then take nice naps for me during the days. Please pray that I don't take being back at work and away from my son too badly.
St. Gianna, patron saint of working mothers, please pray for us.
St. Joseph, pray for us.
Monday, April 16, 2012
Panic!
Elijah has recently moved out of our room and into the nursery, which is all of like six steps across the hall from our room. His bedtime is around 8 pm. We have a specialized routine: last bottle, diaper change, pajamas, book, cuddles, and bed. He wakes up for bottles at 4:30 or 5 and then again at 6:30 or 7.
Last night, we went through our little bed time dance. Mommy read the book while Daddy snuggled the baby and then set him in the crib. We turned off the light, left the room and went to have dinner. We checked on him before we went to bed and then it was lights out.
The next time I looked at the clock was when Nathan's alarm went off at 6:45 this morning. I realized right after I opened my eyes that I hadn't gotten up that night. I looked at Nathan and said "Did you wake up with him?"
"No." I jumped out of bed and ran the six steps to the door. Peeking inside, I saw Little Man, stretching in his sleep.
He had wiggled out of his swaddler a little bit and moved toward the end of the crib, which made me afraid we had missed his crying. There was a thunderstorm last night and the windows in our room rattle horribly in the wind; it could have happened.
Nathan assured me we didn't and I tried to go back to sleep. 15 minutes later an insistent little whine came over the baby monitor.
"There's no way we would have missed that," I said, and went to get our little sleeper out of his crib.
Last night, we went through our little bed time dance. Mommy read the book while Daddy snuggled the baby and then set him in the crib. We turned off the light, left the room and went to have dinner. We checked on him before we went to bed and then it was lights out.
The next time I looked at the clock was when Nathan's alarm went off at 6:45 this morning. I realized right after I opened my eyes that I hadn't gotten up that night. I looked at Nathan and said "Did you wake up with him?"
"No." I jumped out of bed and ran the six steps to the door. Peeking inside, I saw Little Man, stretching in his sleep.
He had wiggled out of his swaddler a little bit and moved toward the end of the crib, which made me afraid we had missed his crying. There was a thunderstorm last night and the windows in our room rattle horribly in the wind; it could have happened.
Nathan assured me we didn't and I tried to go back to sleep. 15 minutes later an insistent little whine came over the baby monitor.
"There's no way we would have missed that," I said, and went to get our little sleeper out of his crib.
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Phase "Not-the-Mama"
My brother once said that babies have two parents: the Mama and Not-the-Mama. He observed this after my sister-in-law went back to work and Nate (my brother) spent weekends home alone with their infant son. For upwards of 12 hours a day, the child my brother nicknamed "Mr. Screamy" screamed at him for no reason other than that he was Not-the-Mama. Eventually, Mr. Screamy grew out of this stage.
Elijah has recently discovered that Nathan is Not-the-Mama. I spend all day everyday cuddling, talking to, singing to, and playing with Elijah. When Nathan comes home, I pass the baby off for bonding with his father, leave the room to work on dinner and within minutes, the screaming commences. Thankfully it doesn't last 12 hours. Nathan is getting pretty good at calming him down by singing, bouncing and walking. And I'm glad it's happening now, when I'm still at home, instead of in a few weeks, when I'll be at work.
But it still breaks my heart. Nathan is already such a great dad. Every phone conversation we have while he is at work begins with "How's the little man?" When he gets home, first thing he checks on Elijah. I can't wait until this phase passes.
Yes, that is Elmo's voice.
Elijah has recently discovered that Nathan is Not-the-Mama. I spend all day everyday cuddling, talking to, singing to, and playing with Elijah. When Nathan comes home, I pass the baby off for bonding with his father, leave the room to work on dinner and within minutes, the screaming commences. Thankfully it doesn't last 12 hours. Nathan is getting pretty good at calming him down by singing, bouncing and walking. And I'm glad it's happening now, when I'm still at home, instead of in a few weeks, when I'll be at work.
But it still breaks my heart. Nathan is already such a great dad. Every phone conversation we have while he is at work begins with "How's the little man?" When he gets home, first thing he checks on Elijah. I can't wait until this phase passes.
Yes, that is Elmo's voice.
Friday, February 24, 2012
7 Quick Takes (Vol. 3)
-one-
I haven't figured out how to live in more than one room with an infant. We set his swing up in our sun room, so that is where Elijah and I live during the day. I set my laptop up in there and we literally don't leave that room until Nathan comes home unless we are running errands or Elijah is sleeping and I'm doing some small chores.
-two-
The laptop sits on the coffee table and I have actually gotten really good at maneuvering around the Internet with my foot. Not kidding. I can't type or anything crazy like that, but the mouse is a touch pad and while I sit on the couch and hold Elijah, I can move the cursor around with my foot and click on things. Usually it's just to change the Pandora station.
-three-
The season finale of Downton Abbey broke my heart. Poor Bates! I hope it all blows over early next season.
-four-
Elijah absolutely refuses to nap in the pack and play that we use for a bassinet. He will nap just fine if I hold him for a while and then put him down in the swing. But if I try to put him down in the pack and play, he will wake up within 5 to 10 minutes screaming. He's too little yet for me to feel comfortable letting him cry it out. At least he's napping somewhere.
-five-
This week I have discovered two blogs I really enjoy. One is brand new. It's called Dough Boy, and is run by my brilliant sister and brother-in-law. Yes, this is a shameless plug. Eric and Elizabeth are foodie extraordinaires, in that they make a lot of what they eat from scratch. They make their own sandwich bread (without a bread maker), crackers, and pizza dough. Eric has also tried his hand at curing bacon, and making cheese (against Elizabeth's wishes). He brews beer and she has made dog biscuits for their beloved French Bulldog, Buddah. I'd just like to mention that I wouldn't mind being a guinea pig for a test batch of homemade marshmallows, or more bacon.
The other blog is called Catholic Cuisine. It's filled with ideas for recipes and meals to make to celebrate or honor feast days and specific liturgical seasons. There are some really neat ideas that I want to try when Elijah gets older.
-six-
We have quite a collection of Disney movies. And lately, I have come into more respect for Hunchback of Notre Dame, previously one of my least favorites. It's a very dark story and must have been hard to adapt. I love that they let it be a little darker than their other movies. They didn't try to take away all its character. Plus, the music is great. Observe:
-seven-
At four weeks, Elijah is following objects with his head and focusing more clearly. He can hold his head up for longer periods of time and is pushing with his legs. His eyes are very slowly getting lighter and his hair is a very pretty gold-red color. He eats 3-4 oz at a time and has started staying awake longer. He is wonderful!
For more 7 Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!
Friday, February 17, 2012
7 Quick Takes
-1-
A rare calm moment during tummy time. Elijah really hates tummy time.
-2-
The cats' reactions to the baby have actually been pretty interesting. Hecate, our antisocial, anti-people cat, really doesn't seem to care at all. She is very much just herself. Hyperion,on the other hand, usually our outgoing gregarious cat, seems to be really put out. Initially we thought it was just because he is no longer allowed in the bedroom, but he will not come anywhere near Elijah and if he does, it usually takes about two seconds before he goes running in the opposite direction.
-3-
We have been blessed these past two weeks with lots of visitors. Friends of Nathan's came to see Elijah a couple days after our arrival, some of my coworkers stopped by this past Monday. We've also hosted several mutual friends and of course, our parents and family. It has been so nice to see people and get to share this happy time with friends and family.
-4-
I can't believe we've been home for two weeks! And Elijah is 3 weeks old!
-5-
Baby boy has really started growing.
We only have a few newborn-sized outfits and I put him in one without
feet yesterday only to find his chubby little ankles stuck out a little
ways above his socks before the cuffs of the legs started. The one I
put him in today almost looks like it's bursting at its seams.
-6-
I'm going to have to find more constructive ways of spending my time at home. While Elijah is sleeping, which he still does quite a bit, I have watched every episode of How I Met Your Mother and I've started on Sherlock, which by the way I love, on Netflix. Apart from laundry, sweeping and thank you cards, there isn't a lot else to do.
-7-
Will try to make future posts not all about the baby, promise.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Elijah Nathan
I was asleep, to begin with. It was mid-afternoon on Wednesday, January 18 and I still had about an hour to sleep. But, the phone rang. In my sleepy haze, I answered the phone and heard Nathan talking about our adoption agency calling him. They said a birthmother in a neighboring state really liked our profile and wanted to talk to us. He kept saying I needed to call the agency because she wanted to talk to us that night. Finally, my mind started working and all I could say was, "Nathan, did she pick us?" He responded with "Yeah, that's why they want you to call them." I hung up right away and called our adoption agency. Our adoption coordinator answered the phone and said "talk about things happening for a reason." Then, she told me about a birthmother who had one or two conditions we initially hadn't said we would accept.
"I didn't mean to send her your profile," the coordinator said. "But I must have accidentally put it in the pile of profiles I sent because she picked you guys and wants to talk to you tonight." She went on to tell me a few things about the birthmother, and that she was having a boy in one week. Then the coordinator gave me Birthmother's name and phone number. I was in shock. We hadn't even heard of this situation before hand. She just liked our profile enough to think we would be good parents to her little boy. Suddenly those few conditions didn't seem so daunting and we were so excited.
Nathan came home that night and we called her. We were all very nervous, but it was a wonderful conversation which lasted about an hour. She told us she wanted us to be in the delivery room when the baby was born. She explained why she picked us and we told her about our lives at home and how we plan to handle day care after I go back to work. She said she expected to need to be induced.
The minute we hung up the phone, I pulled out our big black duffel bag and started packing it. I made sure the diaper bag was still packed from the last time we got called. We told our parents and siblings. We told our bosses. Things went on pretty much as they had before. I spoke with the birthmother one other time as we waited. But, really, things were different. I bought a car seat.
I put together the swing we bought and the bouncy seat we received as a present from my brother and sister-in-law.
We had to get all our paperwork updated and retained lawyers in both our state and Birthmother's state. Birthmother was due on Friday, January 27 and we were ready to head to her state when she was induced.
Nathan responded to all this stress by not sleeping. He wasn't going to bed until 3 am most nights. Finally on Wednesday the 25th, his body said "no more" and he was in bed at 7 pm. That was my Sunday, so I stayed up, sitting at my computer reading articles about newborn care and playing an on-line game with a friend from work. (We all keep strange hours.) At 4 am Thursday, January 26, Nathan's alarm went off. He didn't move and I shut if off.
Fifteen minutes later the phone rang, it was Birthmother. "Margaret, I'm in labor," she said. "Okay, we'll be there as fast as we can," was all I could say. I shook Nathan's shoulder and woke him. "Birthmother is in labor, we have to leave now." "What?" he responded. I finished packing our big duffel bag, I double checked both of the baby's bags. An hour later, after Nathan had checked the car over carefully and we installed the car seat for the first time, we left. We drove for seven hours, had one near miss with a semi and arrived safely at the hospital.
We made it, Birthmother was still in labor. Her parents were both in the room and a friend of hers arrived. Everyone was wonderful and even the hospital staff referred to us as "the parents." She started pushing about 2 hours after we got there. I stood on her left side and helped brace her while she pushed. Nathan sat in the corner.
Baby boy arrived at 4:46 pm Thursday, January 26, 2012. He was 8.09 lbs and 20 1/2 in. We named him Elijah Nathan. He was perfect and pink and healthy.
When the doctor pulled him out and placed him on Birthmother's chest, she reached down and grabbed my hand, pulling it up to the baby's stomach. I could feel tears running down my cheeks. I glanced over and Nathan was standing up, smiling with a look of complete awe and happiness. Then they took Elijah off and cleaned him up, wrapped him and handed him to me. I couldn't help it, I started singing to him. The first song that came to my mind, which, I think is called "The Spinning Wheel." After that, I handed him to Nathan.
The hospital gave us an empty room to stay in so that Elijah could be with us and we could feed and change him. We were there for two days before moving to a hotel. The next day we traveled to a bigger city where the lawyer's office is and stayed in a hotel there. It was another five days before we finally received clearance from our state and Birthmother's state and were told we could leave.
It has been so nice to be home. Elijah is such a good baby, he sleeps well and eats well. He doesn't fuss unless he is wet or hungry or wants his pacifier.
We thank God for Birthmother and for everyone who has supported us and cheered for us all along the way.
"I didn't mean to send her your profile," the coordinator said. "But I must have accidentally put it in the pile of profiles I sent because she picked you guys and wants to talk to you tonight." She went on to tell me a few things about the birthmother, and that she was having a boy in one week. Then the coordinator gave me Birthmother's name and phone number. I was in shock. We hadn't even heard of this situation before hand. She just liked our profile enough to think we would be good parents to her little boy. Suddenly those few conditions didn't seem so daunting and we were so excited.
Nathan came home that night and we called her. We were all very nervous, but it was a wonderful conversation which lasted about an hour. She told us she wanted us to be in the delivery room when the baby was born. She explained why she picked us and we told her about our lives at home and how we plan to handle day care after I go back to work. She said she expected to need to be induced.
The minute we hung up the phone, I pulled out our big black duffel bag and started packing it. I made sure the diaper bag was still packed from the last time we got called. We told our parents and siblings. We told our bosses. Things went on pretty much as they had before. I spoke with the birthmother one other time as we waited. But, really, things were different. I bought a car seat.
Nathan responded to all this stress by not sleeping. He wasn't going to bed until 3 am most nights. Finally on Wednesday the 25th, his body said "no more" and he was in bed at 7 pm. That was my Sunday, so I stayed up, sitting at my computer reading articles about newborn care and playing an on-line game with a friend from work. (We all keep strange hours.) At 4 am Thursday, January 26, Nathan's alarm went off. He didn't move and I shut if off.
Fifteen minutes later the phone rang, it was Birthmother. "Margaret, I'm in labor," she said. "Okay, we'll be there as fast as we can," was all I could say. I shook Nathan's shoulder and woke him. "Birthmother is in labor, we have to leave now." "What?" he responded. I finished packing our big duffel bag, I double checked both of the baby's bags. An hour later, after Nathan had checked the car over carefully and we installed the car seat for the first time, we left. We drove for seven hours, had one near miss with a semi and arrived safely at the hospital.
We made it, Birthmother was still in labor. Her parents were both in the room and a friend of hers arrived. Everyone was wonderful and even the hospital staff referred to us as "the parents." She started pushing about 2 hours after we got there. I stood on her left side and helped brace her while she pushed. Nathan sat in the corner.
Baby boy arrived at 4:46 pm Thursday, January 26, 2012. He was 8.09 lbs and 20 1/2 in. We named him Elijah Nathan. He was perfect and pink and healthy.
When the doctor pulled him out and placed him on Birthmother's chest, she reached down and grabbed my hand, pulling it up to the baby's stomach. I could feel tears running down my cheeks. I glanced over and Nathan was standing up, smiling with a look of complete awe and happiness. Then they took Elijah off and cleaned him up, wrapped him and handed him to me. I couldn't help it, I started singing to him. The first song that came to my mind, which, I think is called "The Spinning Wheel." After that, I handed him to Nathan.
The hospital gave us an empty room to stay in so that Elijah could be with us and we could feed and change him. We were there for two days before moving to a hotel. The next day we traveled to a bigger city where the lawyer's office is and stayed in a hotel there. It was another five days before we finally received clearance from our state and Birthmother's state and were told we could leave.
It has been so nice to be home. Elijah is such a good baby, he sleeps well and eats well. He doesn't fuss unless he is wet or hungry or wants his pacifier.
We thank God for Birthmother and for everyone who has supported us and cheered for us all along the way.
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